
There is no taking that back.Ī man named Benedict Smith once wrote, “I asked her if she believed in love, and she smiled and said it was her most elaborate method of self-harm.” Being in love is both scary and wonderful, terrible and rewarding. You show the person (and are forced to acknowledge yourself) that you are completely devoted to them. You’ve shown them your hand and you have to hope for the best.

When you say you’re in love with someone, you’ve put all your chips on the table.

You completely dedicate yourself to your partner.It forces you to confront those bad feelings from your past, all the while hoping that this time things will be different. You can keep yourself somewhat reserved while dating, but when you decide to say “I’m in love with you,” you throw caution to the wind. When a new person comes along, those experiences are right in the forefront of your mind, warning you to be cautious. Whenever someone you love hurts you, it leaves you with a kind of trauma that you will never forget. If you’ve been in love before, saying you’re in love with a new person can no doubt bring up old feelings. When you give your heart to a person, it’s like taking a leap off a ledge and hoping there’s a giant net at the bottom.

For many people, learning to trust is a huge issue because they’ve been hurt or betrayed in the past.
Im in love with you how to#
You’re taking a very high stakes gamble here.īecause you put yourself in the most vulnerable position when you know how to say “I’m in love with you” and you tell someone, it leaves you no choice but to trust them. Even if you know you’re in love, saying it out loud makes it even more real and even more frightening. Knowing that it can be extremely scary to utter those words. When you say that you’re in love with someone, you leave yourself open to this possibility. But anyone who has been heartbroken by a lover knows that that particular brand of incredible pain can tear you apart, sometimes for years. It can especially happen when someone close to you dies. Heartbreak can happen if a beloved friendship comes to a close. That’s part of what makes it so hard to say in the first place, especially if you pride yourself on being an independent person. Naturally, letting someone know that they have such incredible access to you and your emotions gives them more power over you. It’s the cliché (but very real) sensation of butterflies.

Loving someone is a great thing, but it is also not purely romantic like saying “I’m in love with you” is. You can say it to your brother, your best friend, and your dog. You could say “I love you” to absolutely anyone. There’s a big difference between understanding how to say “I’m in love with you” and saying “I love you.”
